The Gift of Independence: An Encore Performance

Last year, I blogged about giving the gift of independence, by teaching your child basic domestic skills that he will use when he is on his own.  I suggested that the holidays was an ideal time to instill these skills, including sewing homemade gifts, ironing the home-made gift, budgeting for store-bought gifts, setting a holiday table, and baking holiday treats.

Rather than scramble at the last minute the summer before college, to teach your child how to do laundry, cook a basic meal, sew on a button, or iron a shirt, teach him through the fun activities we do around the holidays.  It could pay off in the long run, when he is cooking for his roommates, giving gifts on a shoestring budget, ironing his clothes for a job interview, or enjoying a first formal dinner with the boss. 

When our children are very young, we sometimes make homemade goodies for gift giving.  This can be a great activity at any age, because each year we may teach more complicated skills.  This is a good time to teach basic cooking skills like boiling, baking, roasting, and frying, or more advanced skills such as the differences between frying and sautéing, stirring and folding, beating and blending, dicing, mincing and chopping, or identifying the various types of flours, sugars, and chocolates.  Then there are all the measuring skills including how to divide or double a recipe. Proud grandparents, grateful friends, or delighted acquaintances, will appreciate a young person’s efforts, but these skills could be a benefit when your child is ready to go off to college and later live in his own apartment. Perhaps he may cook for the crowd, rather than rely on frozen TV dinners, take-out pizza, and unhealthy convenience foods.

We hope our children will learn to dress for success, but that takes skill too. Getting dressed up for the holidays or any special occasion could entail ironing a shirt, pants, or dress; sewing on a missing button or repairing a sagging hem; and laundering clothes according to the washing directions.  When it comes time for the big interview or a dinner meeting with his first employer, your child will literally have his best foot (no sneakers allowed) forward.

And speaking of success, it could be helpful to understand all the extra silverware on a table or the difference between wine, champagne, port, and liqueur, when the business meeting is at a five-star restaurant.  Having your child set the table for a holiday meal and partake in the festivities could be an ideal time to teach such etiquettes.

Based on phone calls that I receive from adolescents, I think we have forgotten to teach phone manners.  Have your child call relatives and friends to invite to a party or gathering.  Teach him how to identify himself to the receiver, speak with correct grammar, in an appropriate voice tone, and to end the conversation with the appropriate ending.  This will come in handy when talking with admissions representatives, setting up job interviews, or making information inquiries.

We rely on schools to teach the academics, but it is parents that teach most life skills.  It’s so much more fun to learn through fun activities that bring joy to others.  Happy holidays!  When the baking, cooking, cleaning, and gift-making is over for this year and you are ready to think about the college search, I’m happy to help you in this next step toward independence. Contact me through my website at www.ruthbrodskyconsulting.com.

Count Your Blessings, then Add One More

Thanksgiving is the traditional occasion that we think about our many blessings, including family, special friends, collegial acquaintances, shelter, food on the table, educational opportunities, employment, and other people, resources, and opportunities that add richness to our lives.  Personally, I am thankful for all of these, and all the unique experiences that I have had, since retiring from the educational institutions that employed me for 30+ years. 

While my children were young and living at home, and I was employed full time, our family found time to volunteer in many capacities throughout the community.  Not unlike many, I was active in PTAs, my place of worship, and local food kitchens, while my spouse and children found their own worthwhile causes to support with their time and energy.

Now that my children are grown, independent, and finding new causes to support, I am one of the lucky ones, upon retirement, to follow my passion of working with adolescents, young adults, and families, as a self-employed business owner. In pursing the business of finding good fit colleges or technical schools for many of my clients, I have become involved in many community organizations, volunteering my services where they fit. 

I hope that many of my clients can take advantage of some of the worthwhile educational and advocacy groups that are in our community.  One such group is the Learning Disabilities Association of America (LDA), and its many affiliates.  Our local affiliate group, LDAMC (Montgomery County, MD) is extremely active, benefitting the community in numerous ways.  Check out their website at http://www.ldamc.org. This group sponsors workshops for parents, educators, and people with learning disabilities, inviting well-known professionals in the field to speak or lead discussions, local agencies to present on current issues, or professionals to teach about educational processes and procedures. One of their unique alliances is the Hangout Hive, a social network and support group for young people with learning disabilities. Another distinctive group is the Parent Connection, a peer-support group for parents of students with learning disabilities. Members have access to the latest current information through the LDAMC Hotline. Their website offers a list of local resources that include tutors, educational consultants, counselors, coaches, diagnostic professionals, and much more.  Members also have access to a monthly newsletter, filled with tips, articles, a listing of all upcoming events, and much more. 

I am active in this outreach group, which is always looking for new approaches to inform the public about issues surrounding the field of learning disabilities.  They are a caring and passionate group of people.  I am thankful for the advocacy of LDAMC and encourage you to add one more blessing to your list, by attending one of their many events in the coming year, making a donation to support the cause, or offering your own services by becoming active in LDAMC.  Happy Thanksgiving!

American students abroad pushed out of 'bubbles' - Boston.com

American students abroad pushed out of 'bubbles' - Boston.com

The study abroad experience should be more of a cultural encounter, than an extended party-like happening.

A Positive Choice

The stress is increasing and the stakes are high. Colleges say they are looking for well-rounded students, with good academics in a challenging curriculum, extracurricular activities that support their passions, and volunteer experiences in their local and global communities.  In addition to taking challenging curriculums, such as IB programs, AP courses, and pre-college post-secondary programs, many students are finding other ways to enhance their high school transcripts. Some participate in summer internships, volunteer in global service projects, or travel abroad to gain experience in the world, while others do it all.

But what happens to those students who can’t do any of it, for financial reasons, academic struggles, social shortcomings, or logistical difficulties?  Many of my clients have learning disabilities or ADHD, and have struggles beyond what the average student is juggling. Some are striving to keep up with a challenging curriculum, in order to maintain a good grade point average (GPA), which often results in little or no participation in extracurricular activities.  Others are taking summer classes, in order to keep their yearlong classes to a minimum, resulting in the inability to travel, participate in a summer internship, or join a volunteer project.  And others are being tutored over the summer, have summer jobs to earn needed money, or are participating in local programs. Not to mention that many students, with or without learning issues, just cannot afford time away from home or need the finances for more mundane necessities.

A recent article in the NY Times entitled “How to Make That College Essay Special” (August 6, 2011), talked about the essay as being more than a showcase of overseas trips and unpaid internships.  The emphasis was on taking whatever experiences a student has had and making it into a catchy essay, by writing about the ordinary in an extraordinary style.  With a little thought and creativity, an ordinary experience can make great reading material. 

I tell my students not to worry about what they are unable to do, but what they have done.  When it comes to writing an essay, preparing for an admissions interview, or writing a personal statement on a college application, the college reps want to know more than your what your GPA, transcript, or college entrance exams say.  This is a student’s sales pitch about how he overcame obstacles, stayed on a steady path, reached out to others, worked to fill a need at home, been influenced by interesting people, or made the best of a difficult situation. It’s not the experience, as much as it is how the experience has impacted the student.  An ordinary experience can be an amazing story, told with a positive spin, a creative style, and a personal touch.

Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell?

By law, colleges are not allowed to ask personal questions of their applicants.  On applications, in interviews, or other correspondences, admission officers must stay away from outright asking about your nationality, religion, age, marital or family status, health and physical disabilities, among a few other off-limits topics.  A good interviewer can discover the information he needs by phrasing questions in such a way that is not illegal, intrusive or offensive to the applicant.  For example, they cannot ask, “What is your native tongue?”, but they can ask, “What languages do you read, speak or write fluently?”

So a typical question from many of my clients is “Do I tell them that I have a learning disability?” The answer is not simple, because it depends.  On the application, the college admissions representatives want to know basic information about a student and her family.  It is usually the essay, personal statement, and/or the additional information section that asks for more information about a student’s character.  My usual response to the question of disclosure is “no”, because colleges want to know what defines a student, or makes them unique, or how a student’s passions impact her life.  Usually a passion has nothing to do with a student’s disabilities, but about her abilities and how well she uses them.  In some cases though, a learning disability could define a student, because she has had to work harder to produce good grades, struggle more with academic materials, make harder choices about course loads, find ways to fit in extra-curricular activities between homework assignments that take longer than the average student, among other uphill battles.  In some cases, the student has struggled for many years, and just recently found out she has a learning disability, and finally has an explanation for her years of struggle. So writing an essay or making a personal statement about being successful, despite a learning disability, could be the way to go.

Sometimes disclosure is a way to explain discrepancies in a transcript.  If the student has good grades, but poor entrance exam scores, or vice versa, an admissions rep will want to know why.  Explaining the discrepancy, before being asked, might be a responsible tactic.  This is especially true, if the student never has a chance to have an admissions interview. This information may fit perfectly in the “Additional Information” section, saving the personal statement or essay for the passions, impacts, and unique experiences.  The key element is to not make excuses for lesser grades or poorer scores, but to explain how the student compensates for one or the other in school. 

Disclosure can sometimes explain a poor transcript, in general.  Less desired grades and poor test scores should be explained.  But again, explanations are preferred, rather than excuses.  The student needs to leave the admissions rep with the impression that the student is a worthwhile candidate for their college. Perhaps the student perseveres despite obstacles, has learned how to process constructive criticism, and now knows when to ask for help.

If the student has the opportunity to have an interview, prior to applying to the college, she may want to talk about her learning disability and how it has impacted her academic success or her personality. Then the admissions representative can be more impressed by the application package.  If the student interviews after an application has been submitted, the student can use this time to further explain discrepancies, or impress the rep with her successes despite her many obstacles. 

Often disclosure is not necessary at all, during the application process.  However, upon acceptance and the decision to attend a particular college, the student must disclose the disability to Disability Support Services in order to obtain needed accommodations.  Read my blog from September 2010, at www.ruthbrodskyconsulting.com, to understand that process better.

Table Talk

One of my most memorable family times, both growing up and as a parent, was dinnertime, when the whole family came together to eat and share their day.  It gave us all an opportunity to catch up on everyone’s happenings, discuss the global world, as well as the local and personal events that affected our lives.  As a parent, these dinners were times for our children to discuss homework assignments- the “stupid” ones along with the intriguing ones; to get ideas for essays and research papers, to share book reviews of English assigned novels, as well as books that they were reading for pleasure; and to discuss teachers’ personalities, quirks, and teaching styles.  My husband and I were both educators, so it gave us a chance to hear different perspectives on school classes, their most beloved and detested teachers, and general goings on around their schools.  We also learned more about their music, books, TV shows, movies, political outlooks, friends, and social events. Sometimes it was just a time to hear what our kids were thinking at that moment, or to listen to them discuss and debate issues among themselves. 

My children are all adults now, but when they return home for family events, we continue our dinnertime conversations.  Now we have more than our immediate family present, because spouses and significant others join us in these tête-à-têtes, and therefore our conversations have broadened to new perspectives.  We still talk about the same types of topics- books we are reading, movies we have seen, political movements we are apart of, trips we have taken, reviews of various kinds, adventures we have encountered, people we have met, friends’ dilemmas and status, and so much more.  The dinnertime dialogue was and continues to be a satisfying experience for our family.

Other families like and unlike us, with different family structures, more scheduled times, and technology tune-outs, may have a different look to the dinnertime table talk, but the intent is the same- to keep lines of communication open. Between chauffeuring kids to sports’ practices, play rehearsals, camp, friends’ houses, the library, and fast food stops, our kids and we are so over scheduled, that it seems that there is little chance for family time.  But with a commitment to make it happen, and a bit of creativity, the opportunities are there.  In talking to some of my clients, I find that some talk on the way to and from church, others have scheduled family councils, or special downtime before everyone retires to their respective areas for the night, or a routine dinner on the way home from a scheduled practice. The venue may change with age and schedules, but the purpose is still the same- to listen, discuss, commiserate, laugh, relax, and support each other.  And no matter how each family is configured, each child gains various perspectives on an issue, from a variety of ages, maturity levels, genders, and can evaluate each one according to his own maturity level. 

In my role as a college consultant, I help students brainstorm for the “infamous” college essay.  I find that many clients draw on their experiences with family to write an interesting and eye-catching essay. Besides the enjoyment of talks with parents, siblings, significant others, grandparents, and extended family, family time becomes a great source for shared stories, creative writing topics, persuasive speeches, and the college essay.  

Beyond the Sales Pitch

So you plan to visit a few colleges this fall.  After checking each college website and finding the tour times, you now need to make your plans to include more than the “sales pitch”.  The typical college campus tour includes an informational session that tells you about popular majors, tuition and financial aid, the admission process, and sometimes the current freshman profile.  Then the tour offers you a quick sweep around the campus to see the dorms, student union, dining hall, sports arena, and perhaps the newest and most prestigious building on campus.  You will see what the college wants you to see, its chief selling points. Hopefully you will have an enthusiastic and personable tour guide, who will take time to answer questions and share some insider information from his perspective.  Often these campus ambassadors are students who are involved in many activities across campus, getting excellent grades to keep their scholarships current, and often do not represent your average student on the campus. Ask questions on the tour, or if you are too shy, ask your parent to ask the questions.  Be sure you listen to the answer!  Usually, after the tour, you will be able to meet with an admissions representative who may ask you questions about your interests and why you are considering this college.  This is also a good time to have a few of your own questions to show that you have a genuine interest in exploring this college.

Try to visit mid-week, when students are in classes, rather than a Friday, when many students are leaving early for the weekend.  If possible, visit colleges before you apply, because it will give you a better idea about whether you even want to apply.  Sometimes a general feeling about the campus, or your guide’s talk will influence your decision to apply. However, try not to judge the campus totally on the tour guide, the admissions meeting, or the total “sales pitch”.  Whether your initial impression is good or bad, you need to do more exploring of the campus.

So how do you find out more about the campus beyond the “dog and pony show”?  First, you need to make sure that you allot more than the two hours for the college information session and campus tour.  When you make the call to the college to set up a visit, you should also set up a time to visit at least one class, but preferably two classes.  One class should be a typical introductory freshman class, because these are usually the larger classes on campus, and the type that a new student will take several of.  The other class should be one in the desired major, or if you have no idea what you want to major in, then pick a topic of interest.  You could check out the catalog and find a course of interest or if you know someone who attends that school, ask for a suggestion.

Next, make sure you have a chance to walk around campus on your own, with your parents who probably brought you. If you have an idea about a major, go to the building that houses most of the courses, labs, and lecture halls.  Look at the bulletin boards for research projects, travel opportunities, lectures on interesting topics, and community service events.  Eat in the dining hall. Do the students look happy? Do they sit in segregated or integrated groups? What is the variety of food?  How was your meal? What else goes on in the dining hall, besides the daily meals? Look around campus, at the bulletin boards and posters for weekend events, special lectures, performances, clubs and sports activities. Stop to talk to students on campus; most students are happy to tell you about their experiences at the college. Pick up a campus newspaper to read later on. If you are staying overnight in town, be sure to check out some of the college nightlife. 

Here’s another tip! Bring your camera and take photos.  This will spark your memory about the campus and what you liked.  And take notes! Let your parents be your note-taker, so you can pay attention to the tour and be observant of the campus. Ask them to write down things that sparked your attention.  They can write their own thoughts down and you can compare notes later.  Or if none of you can tour and take notes at the same time, do a joint “brain dump” when you get back to the car.  You don’t want to forget certain things or find that one college visit blends into another.

If you are a student with an IEP or 504 Plan, you should allow time to visit Disability Support Services (DSS).  If this is your first time visiting the campus, you don’t have to disclose your name, but you should go in to see the facilities, meet some of the staff, and ask a few questions.  If you made an appointment ahead of time to speak with a DSS representative, perhaps you can speak a little about your situation and the supports that are helping you to succeed in high school. You should also make note of where the DSS office is located on campus, to see if it is accessible to classes, the dorms, or the center of student life.   It’s accessibility on campus may determine how likely you are to use the facilities.

Once you have narrowed your college choices, you should stay overnight at as many campuses as possible.  If you know a current student there, try to spend one day and night or a weekend with her.  This will allow you to see what the dorms are really like, taste the food in the dining hall, experience what social activities are available and well attended, and see when and where students are congregating and studying. If you don’t know anyone at a particular college, the admissions office will usually be able to arrange an overnight with a host student, who can show you around, introduce you to her friends, and answer some of your burning questions, that weren’t addressed on the tour.  If you are serious about a particular college, arrange to meet with a professor in your field of interest. Ask questions about research opportunities or internships.  If you are considering participating in a sport, arrange another visit with the coach. 

If you need help in organizing your college visits, need a list of questions to ask DSS, or a checklist for campus tours, or just want more information on how to proceed with the college search, contact Ruth Brodsky at www.ruthbrodskyconsulting.com. Ruth has helped numerous students navigate this important and exciting adventure.

And When I Grow Up, I Want to be …….

When you ask a 5-year old what he wants to be when he grows up, some typical answers might be a fireman, astronaut, or baseball player, among others.  When you ask a middle-schooler what he wants to do when he grows up, he may tell you a myriad of careers that he sees played in the media, or jobs his family members or adult friends may have.  Even at the high school level, many students still cite careers from the same sources, knowing very little about career paths prior to graduation. For some students, going to some type of college is an expectation by the family, or even the student himself, but often what to major in is a complete unknown. 

Certainly it is not a necessity to know exactly what one wants to be by the age of 18.  However, knowing what some of the options are, will help in the decision-making.  I recently conducted a workshop for parents of middle-schoolers, talking about planning for their children’s future.  The emphasis of this workshop was how to help students plan now, for work or some type of post-secondary education.  We talked about ways to introduce children to the idea of careers.  Besides talking about their own jobs, parents suggested joining their children in TV viewing and discussing some of the occupations held by the various characters in sit-coms, dramas, game shows, or news shows. Parents could also discuss various careers when they visit the dentist, pediatrician, restaurants, museums, and grocery or department stores.  Conversations should not just revolve around the manager, owner, or dominant occupation, but all the support people that keep the business, office, or organization going. Books that can help may include:  A Day in the Life Of series by Liza N. Burby or Mary Bowman-Kruhm, Grow Up, Get a Job by Kerlin & Schneider, Career Match by Shoya Zichy, or the Occupational Outlook Handbook, published by the U.S. Department of Labor.

One program that has been around for 18 years, has made it their mission to introduce children to future opportunities of education, careers, and balancing work with family life.  The Take Our Daughters And Sons To Work Foundation has an annual day designed with interactive activities, to empower all children to dream of a productive future.   This year’s theme was “Invent the Future”, with activities that revolved around math, science, social studies, language arts, and art. Check out their website at http://www.daughtersandsonstowork.org to find out more about the organization and how you can participate in both national and local activities for next year. 

By the time students enter high school, having an idea of various careers could be beneficial to choosing their courses, finding a summer job, participating in service learning or community service, and choosing their extra-curricular activities.  One way to enhance a high school transcript or to prepare to write a college essay, is to have one or more passions or interests. The 4-year plan for a high school student should include courses that might introduce him to a career path.  Through service-learning, community service, or extra-curricular activities, students can explore a career path, investigate an area of interest, make a commitment to an ideal, become an activist, or support an  advocacy group.  The typical summer job should be more than a way to make money. If possible, students should attempt to find paid-internships or jobs that will introduce them to future opportunities in education or careers.  The school guidance office or career office should be able to help a student find such opportunities.

     

Another way to explore careers is to take a career inventory, guided by a professional. Sometimes career inventories are administered in middle school, students are given the results, but nothing happens afterwards.  Students need guidance to understand the results, which often shows the student’s strengths and weaknesses, and the careers that would fit the strengths.  There needs to be a discussion beyond the list, and a further exploration of what each career entails. A good inventory would follow up with a thorough job description and related occupations, education/training requirements, necessary skills, possible college majors, common work activities, potential salaries, and a career’s popularity within a geographical region.  If you would like your high school student to explore different professions using a career inventory, Ruth Brodsky Consulting can help.  Please contact me at ruth@ruthbrodskyconsulting.com or through my website at www.ruthbrodskyconsulting.com. 

Stake Out the Resources

Your child is ready to start the college search process.  But you are worried.  Your child has suffered with depression, anxiety, or some other mental health issue.  He managed to get through high school, with few scars, but only because the resources were nearby, plentiful, and appropriate to his needs.

You want your child to go to college, and he wants to go.  He has the grades to succeed, has good social skills, but is he emotionally ready?  You have had the discussion with him and his therapist, and everyone agrees that he should go, as long as he has supports.  Thus starts your homework.  Your child may be able to help, but this task is more a parental one. 

Step 1.  As your child makes his college list, you need to check into the support services available.  All colleges have counseling centers, but not all provide the same supports.  You need to call each college to inquire about their counseling services.  Questions to ask may include who qualifies for services, how the student accesses services, what the qualifications of the staff are, what the fees are, what the confidentiality policy entails, if there is a psychiatrist on staff who can prescribe and manage medication, if there is a crisis hotline and response team, and what other outside resources are available.  Some of this information may be found on the college website, but for clarifications or specifics, it is best to call.

Step 2.  Once your child has been accepted and has decided to attend a specific college, you need to make arrangements for his mental health needs at that institution. You and your child should make a visit to the counseling center together, before school starts, to put an action plan in place.  Colleges expect students to be self-advocates, however most counseling centers will include the parent in the initial meeting, if the student agrees.  You should discuss what services he is receiving at home and try to find a similar regiment at college. 

Step 3. If the college counseling center does not have a psychiatrist/therapist on staff, you will need to find out where one is located, near the college and convenient for your child. Your child’s psychiatrist/therapist should be able to make a recommendation for a local contact or the college counseling center should be able to give you a list of recommended professionals.

Step 4. Before your child starts college, perhaps sometime in the summer, he should visit with his hometown therapist and/or psychiatrist.  Part of their discussion should include medication management, storage of medications, how the therapist can be contacted, if you child needs to talk to him, and how to deal with emergencies.

Step 5. Your child should know how to refill his medications on time, unless you decide to take charge of this task.  Make sure you find a local pharmacist, convenient for your child, to pick up his medications.  Or if you use a mail order pharmacy, make sure you keep track of when it is shipped and notify your child when to check his mailbox at college.

Step 6.  Buy your child a small safe to store his medications.  Medications should be locked in a safe at all times, within the dorm room, only accessed by your child, and never shared with others.

Step 7.  This should really be Step 1, because your child should be taking his medications independent from your reminders.  However, if you are still reminding him, now is the time for him to develop this skill, since no one at college will do the reminding.  After discussion, he may decide to set an alarm for each medication, using his cell phone, IPOD, or other device. 

Step 8. And speaking of technology, make sure your child has 911 programmed into his cell phone, along with contacts of his various therapists. 

Step 9. Before he goes to college, you should have several discussions about what to do in an emergency, how to contact the appropriate therapists, the importance of taking medications on time and the consequences of not following the medication regime, the benefits of seeing a therapist in the counseling center or within the local neighborhood, and that you are there to support him, whenever he needs you.

Colleges deal with numerous students who have mental health issues.  Making the transition to college, facing multiple exams, dealing with new social dilemmas, or trying to balance problems at home with new expectations at college, students often need to reach out for help.  Countless students are successfully navigating the changes, but we as parents want to make sure the path is a smoother and empower our children with the right tools to succeed, despite their own obstacles.

Which College Entrance Exam is Better: SAT or ACT?

In the competitive world of college entrance exams, where students are enrolling in SAT prep classes, hiring tutors to help them attain better scores, and taking the tests multiple times in order to get a top-rate score that will impress colleges, there still lies an unanswered question.  Should I take the SAT or the ACT, or both? 

Though the question seems straightforward and simple, the answer relies on several factors to consider. First, the tests are different. Second, depending on the student’s academic abilities and/or emotional stamina, one might be a better option than the other.  Finally, a student’s test-taking skills could be the deciding factor between the two types of tests. 

The SAT is a reasoning skills test that measures critical thinking skills.  The test is comprised of 10 sections that cover critical reading, mathematics, and writing, each focusing on vocabulary, reading comprehension, general reasoning and problem-solving skills. In addition, despite the fact that many colleges do not consider it as part of their admissions criteria, there is a required writing section. Each reading passage has questions pertaining to comprehension and sentence completion, focusing on grammar, punctuation and syntax. The math section covers arithmetic, geometry, algebra, and algebra II. Each section of the test is scored on a scale of 200 – 800.  Unlike the ACT, the SAT DOES penalize for wrong answers by deducting ¼ point for each wrong answer.  The length of the test is 3 hours and 45 minutes, with brief breaks between subtests.

The ACT is a curriculum-based achievement test with four sections: reading, math, English, and science.  Unlike the SAT, it offers an optional writing section. The Reading section has 4 passages with 10 questions per passage. The math section covers arithmetic, algebra, geometry, and trigonometry. The ACT is scored on a scale of 1 – 36, which is the average of the four main sections, and DOES NOT penalize for wrong answers.  The length of the test is 3 hours and 25 minutes, including the 30-minute optional writing section.

Knowing the composition of each type of test helps somewhat in deciding which one to take.  However, if the student has a learning disability, ADHD, psychiatric problems, or medical conditions, there are additional considerations. Some of these include processing speed, comprehension skills, ability to concentrate on printed material for periods of 30 minutes or more, ability to track across a page of dense words, anxiety levels under stress, and familiarity with multiple-choice tests, among others. Many students with impairments that impact their learning are eligible for accommodations with current and full documentation, but the student still needs to consider his learning style, academic needs, and test-taking abilities. 

I often suggest trying out both tests to find a good fit.  Most students are required by their school to take the PSAT in their sophomore year, as a practice.  Students could also take the PLAN, which is ACT’s version of a practice test.  Though few schools offer this, I would recommend asking about it at your child’s school.  If this is not an option, the student can sign up online for the ACT Online Prep, which includes a diagnostic test. If this is not an option due to focus problems or inability to work independently, the student may want to take the ACT in the junior year. After taking both the PSAT, and the PLAN or ACT as practice, the student should weigh the pros and cons of each, then decide to take one or the other, as his college entrance exam.  The student should not take both tests multiple times, as this can become overwhelming and frustrating, and only intrudes on study time for daily schoolwork.  Most colleges accept either test, so the student should choose the test that fits his strengths.

Most students are offered a test prep course in the junior year, that teaches test-taking skills and provides practice tests within the course curriculum.  If the student has a learning problem, I usually suggest individual tutoring, with a tutor that understands various learning disabilities and can provide strategies specific to the student’s individual needs.  Sitting in a course that teaches to the average student without disabilities, will not be as effective as one-on-one help with a tutor who understands various learning problems.     

I have found over the years, that many of my students with learning disabilities, ADHD, and psychiatric impairments such as anxiety or depression, will feel more comfortable with the ACT.  Generally, this is because the test has a familiar looking format, uses curriculum-based topics, and does not penalize for wrong answers.  But each student is different, and must decide for himself, which test suits him.  If you are working with an independent college consultant, like myself, she can help the student decide by asking a series of pertinent questions.  Check me out on my website, www.ruthbrodskyconsulting.com, and call with any questions.

Trust Your Instincts

As a special educator in both the private and public sector, I have spent many hours listening to parents gripe about the school system, medical field, and mental health professionals, especially when it comes to listening to parents speak on behalf of their child.  Having respect for these fields does not excuse the way some of the professionals treat parents. Instead of listening to the child and his parents, considering their perspective, and becoming a partner in solving the situation, some professionals in these fields believe they know better than the parents.

I experienced my own version of this phenomenon many years ago.  I raised my children in the 80s and 90s, when several of the diagnoses and medical conditions that are familiar today, had not yet been recognized.  Being an educator, in the field of special education, I had first-hand knowledge of behaviors, symptoms, and manifestations of many disorders, disabilities, and learning problems.  Therefore when one of my daughters exhibited behaviors such as poor organization of her belongings and her time, difficulty with the processes of math, forgetting to turn in completed assignments, low frustration levels, poor self-esteem, rushing through school assignments, unless she was greatly interested in the topic, easily angered, annoyed, or upset, and did not respond well to any motivator dangled in front of her, I suspected that she was suffering from ADHD.  We took her to a recommended psychologist, who spoke to her and us, then decided that this was just her personality.  He looked at her report cards, with kudos of great intelligence, curiosity, and excellent reading and writing skills, and deduced that we should work with her on organizational skills and get her a math tutor.  We did both, but the problems continued. When we returned to the same psychologist the following year, he did diagnose her with depression and placed her on anti-depressants, as he felt that she was highly affected by a major illness in our immediate family. With the start of middle school, her grades fluctuated wildly depending on the time of year, how structured the teachers were, and how interested she was in the subject matter.  But her self-esteem, especially at school, decreased even more. We took her to a new psychologist, who interviewed a more frustrated child and family. This time she did some formal testing, which showed a pre-disposition towards oppositional defiant behavior and mild depression, but no ADHD.  We did not agree with the diagnosis, but did agree to try a different anti-depressant, thinking it might help. We were never sure that it did, and our daughter reported mixed feelings about its benefits.  High school was a bumpy ride. Despite wonderful experiences in extra-curricular activities, subjects that she loved, and a good social niche, the original problems became more intense and trickier to deal with. More demanding organizational skills led to greater frustration, resulting in lower grades, even in subjects that she loved and could demonstrate solid knowledge. Poor grades meant she did not qualify for some extra-curricular activities, taking her out of the realm where she excelled. It became heart breaking for us, as parents, to watch her struggle in school and other aspects of her life.  Upon graduation from high school, this very capable young lady was afraid to attend college, despite her intense love of learning.  She did attend several post-secondary options for a short period of time, before deciding to quit and move into the work-world. 

It was in the year 2000, when I attended a CHADD (Children and Adults with Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder) Conference and attended a workshop on ADHD in girls, that all my suspicions were confirmed.  Comparisons with boys’ behaviors were the norm, until 1995, when researchers started investigative studies about girls’ manifestations of ADHD. It turns out that the medical and mental health professionals did not know that what they were seeing in my daughter, were typical signs of ADHD for girls. Parental guilt set in, thinking about all the things that could have been, the accommodations that could have supported her in school, the different structures that could have been put in place to help her succeed and build positive self-esteem, and the social punishments that could have been avoided, like ineligibility for extra-curricular programs.  I began to read more on the subject and after much soul-searching, my husband and I decided to lay the guilt to rest and move on.  Our first step was to have a long discussion with our daughter, apologizing for letting her down in this aspect of her upbringing, but letting her know that we would support her in the next steps she would take as an adult.  She has found her niche in life as an independent young adult, though I feel that the scars of the past may still define some of her insecurities. Nevertheless, we are continuously proud of her personal and professional accomplishments, intense love of learning, caring for others, sense of humor, and loving relationships with friends and family. 

This very personal experience has guided me in my professional life.  I encourage parents to share their concerns with experts who are in the position to support their child; and to listen, but not to accept on blind faith that the medical doctor, psychologist, or educator has the total answer. Misdiagnosis is unfair to the child because she will not receive the correct treatment and it is also unfair to the parent, who now feels more frustration. The diagnosis should be a collaborative exercise, as part of a parent-child-professional team. If the professional is not willing to be part of the parent-child team, then perhaps it is time to find another professional.  Parents know so much more than medical and educational specialists give them credit for.

When a child is struggling academically, socially, or emotionally, it is the parents’ responsibility to tirelessly navigate the procedures to get the necessary help.  Though it can be hard to share personal hardships with friends and families, it is often these people who can share similar experiences, make good suggestions for useful strategies or recommendations for added resources. Finding a professional can be even harder, due to insurance limitations, finances, or time and location constraints. As parents, we are our child’s best advocates, and though we risk being titled a “helicopter” parent, it is our obligation to push until we find someone who will listen and partner with us to come up with viable solutions.  Even with a diagnosis, the professionals should continue the relationship or refer to another professional who will establish a new relationship, while providing services or resources, and periodic evaluations of them.  Our child’s self-esteem, desires to be the best, and ultimate success is in the hands of a good collaborative team, who can provide direction, supervision, and teamwork.